allowing rest in transitions, traveling through to the present moment. come with me as i leave Colorado and connect with the world.

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Happiness Carousel rabbit sky love

i just found out: i’m dying. so i wrote a poem: it's all very tragic and not all at the same time.

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dog meditation

ball rolls away, go get it.
ball rolls away, go get it.
ball rolls away, go get it.
come back, ball rolls away.
come back, ball rolls away.
come back to the breath
let it roll away,
come and go,
back to the breath.
get it?
the ball is your mind.
getting it is happiness.

dog meditation.

dog meditation

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on Building a Home in the Sky: Converting Groundlessness to Spaciousness.

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The Event of a Thread — Day 6

“It is hard to be brave,” said Piglet, sniffing slightly, “when you’re only a Very Small Animal.”

Rabbit, who had begun to write very busily, looked up and said:

“It is because you are a very small animal that you will be Useful in the adventure before us.”

~ Benjamin Hoff, The Te of Piglet ~

today’s Event of a Thread was Epic. i was there from 9am-5pm. i showed up for a full “work day,” but it was perceived as an eternity. it amazes me how vast time is and how quickly things can change; it is very easily possible to lose track of one’s self and of the little things in life when we succumb to the chaos that surrounds us.

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the event of a thread — Day 4

today marked my first Saturday shift at the event of a thread. welcome to wild weekends at the Armory!

up until this point, i have been so appreciative of the way that people have interacted with this exhibit. i was stunned by the environment that Ann had created. somehow, through her care, meticulousness, and attention to detail, i felt that she had succeeded in creating a space where there were very little rules enforced and yet the audience was so respectful of it. even when the audience was high energy, no one was climbing all over the exhibit, poking at the pigeons, or particularly active in our personal areas. at least, i hadn’t experienced this, until today.

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Event of a Thread — Day 2

working a shift at night is a totally different feeling.

you would think that i would be used to it, having worked in bars and clubs for so many years that i can’t even count the number on both hands. but even after all this time, it is still easier for me to get it together and get to places on time (early, even) in the morning. at the end of the day, i struggle. perhaps it’s due to the accumulation of energy. maybe depending on how you use it during the day, you’re either slower and more tired, wanting to crash on the couch or you’re amp’d up, full of life and want to expend some of that energy being with your friends and letting loose. while i’ve mostly lived a life of the latter, it feels that these days my body craves the kind of life where i am up with the sun and resting when the creatures of the night make their debut.

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:: Fear Continues to Rage On ::

so i did it again. i freaked out because i am afraid of things that aren’t going to hurt me.

last night, i resolved to shower in the outside shower. our inside one is right next to my parents’ room and my mom goes to bed early. so it was a practical decision, but i also decided to overcome the fear of our backyard at night, which has plagued me for as long as i can remember.

i mean, it’s fenced in for chrissakes, and i have a new philoSophie about co-existence with bugs. so i am going to shower out there dammit. this is what i thought, and anyway, the air con inside was making me feel cold and artificial. i am not going to become disembodied by my own fear.

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:: Yoga/Suzuki Revelations ::

we don’t have to be straight all the time!

when i try to “be straight,” i find myself locking into a position rather than fluidly remaining upright.

the key is to release into whatever pose or position i find myself in—straight, crooked, warped and everything in between. because when i think about holding myself straight, that’s exactly what i do: i hold. i hold tension, i hold my breath, and i hold myself in a position that is either not straight at all or else it quickly devolves from straightness because it is not fluid with the movement of my breath.

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:: Day Seven Back in NYC – One Week Anniversary! ::

well, it looks like all it took was a night of getting a few drinks, having great artistic conversation, and pushing myself to go to bed a couple hours later than the jet lag time was allowing—and i am back on my usual sleep schedule. i was enjoying the wack-a-doodle times that the jet lag was making me awake, but i don’t think waking up around 1am or 4am is the kind of thing that one can do regularly and be a functioning member of society (for most intents and purposes anyway).

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